Monday, January 19, 2009

¿podemos estar de acuerdo que viajando es magnífico? / can we all just agree that traveling is magnificent?

como ya les avisé, me voy al perú. no se si voy a escribir algo mientras estoy viajando, pero al derecho hay enlaces a blogs mucho más bueno que c.w.a.j.a.?. si necesites algo para leer. prometo que les contaré algunos cuentitos interesantes al regresar; no les olvidaré.


like i already told you, i'm going to peru. i don't know if i'm going to write anything while i'm traveling, but to the right are links to blogs much better than c.w.a.j.a.?. if you need something to read. i promise i'll tell you some interesting stories when i return; i won't forget you.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

sometimes the only answer is no answer.

five year old, conversationally: "well, you know mr. skippy with his pineapple bottom."

preschoolers are excellent scientists.

it is dinner time, and mom has left us with the usual instructions: those who eat good dinners can have dessert. she had time to tell us what constituted a good dinner, which is lucky for the kids because her ideas of a good dinner are much more lenient than mine.

five year old, holding up an orange slice and pointing at the peel with exaggerated wide eyes: "do we have to eat even THIS part?"

i knew that he was being silly, and i answered, "no. that part isn't very good to eat." i was just about to tell them about orange zest and its applications for recipes (because i love that part of hanging out with kids! the hey-here's-a-thing-i-know! part!) when i was interrupted by the almost four year old, who made a horrible face and announced very seriously: "YOU ARE RIGHT."

and i admire that kind of commitment to hypothesis testing, i really do.

truly, individual perception is an incredible thing.

the almost-four year old had chosen guava juice for her dinner drink. the five year old was definitely not on team guava.

five year old: "i've had guava juice before, and it tastes like...[looks warily over to me, sees that i'm paying attention] tastes like...[looks at me again, trying to decide if it's worth getting in trouble for using "bathroom talk" in his quest to describe the flavor of guava juice][realizes that i'm not going to let him get away with a scatological comparison]...WOOD.

almost-four year old, immediately: "no. to me it tastes like PRINCESSES."

Monday, January 05, 2009

possibly the most ridiculous text message not intended for me i've received to date:

"Who's hot... You!
Who's fine... You!
Who's cute.. You!
Who's sexy.. You!
Who's a liar..ME!!
Hahaha jk."

i would like to take this opportunity to remind everyone of several important points:
  1. ellipses consist of three dots, and should have a space neither before nor after.
  2. capital letters are not necessary after ellipses.
  3. question marks (?) are required when one is asking a question.
  4. exclamation points, which must be used sparingly, should appear singly (!) or in groups of three (!!!).
  5. words written in all capital letters tend to evoke shouting. shouting is rather uncouth.
  6. "jk," while not quite as bad as "lol*," is still a totally stupid thing to write.
thus, corrected, this misdirected text message would actually read:

"Who's hot? You!
Who's fine? You!
Who's cute? You!
Who's sexy? You!
Who's a liar? Me!!!
Hahaha. I'm sorry for accidentally sending this text message to you when I clearly intended to send it to someone else. I'm extra sorry for accidentally sending this text message to you when you were kind of hoping for a text message from someone you'd recently begun to find rather shiny but who actually didn't end up sending you anything today at all.. JK LOL!!"

*"lol" is the bane of my internet existence.

this is one way to deal with the government auctioning off public land to be destroyed by oil and gas companies:

(ap story, via huffington post) a 27 year old university of utah student named tim dechristopher went to a bureau of land management auction in december and starting bidding on parcels of federal land that were being sold to oil and gas companies. he won 13 of them, and managed to make others much more expensive than they would have been otherwise.

"I thought I could be effective by making bids, driving up prices for others and winning some bids myself," the Salt Lake City man said.
DeChristopher snapped up 22,500 acres of land around Arches and Canyonlands parks but said he could afford to pay for only a few of those acres. He owes $1.7 million on all of his leases.

he's expecting federal charges, he says, and he's "willing to deal with that."

somewhere, edward abbey is smiling.

i am glad that you made it back okay.

me: "are you getting ready to the frozen white north?"

jesse danger: "yes. it's super frozen right now too
like a billionteen and a half below zero."

note to self: don't make that guy mad.

ralph: "i hope a pigeon pees on her."

Thursday, January 01, 2009