happy mother's day!

i hope you get to hug your mom, and the other important women in your life too. (i love you, mamacita!)

and don't forget, mother's day was not invented by hallmark, but instead created by julia ward howe, an abolitionist, as an anti-war observance inspired by the horrors of the civil war.

lack of context leads to unintentional hilarity

frequently when i'm on the telephone with the nephews' mama, she says funny things. sometimes this is on purpose (she is a pretty funny lady, and we've known each other so long that we have plenty of inside jokes and references that wouldn't mean much to anyone else but that crack us up.)

and i like it when she makes me laugh intentionally, i really do.

sometimes much funnier, though, are the times when what she says is totally reasonable for the circumstances in which she finds herself (and the nephews), but totally hilarious to people (me) without the same context.

let me demonstrate:

"you guys can play baby all you want but you're not going to be in the fridge."

of course, since i'm a good friend, i try to support her parenting by not laughing loudly while she's disciplining the children.

sometimes i fail.

the nephews' mama knows me pretty well.

me: blah blah blah possibility that probably isn't going to end up working out blah blah blah "...it would be fun, but it's not keeping me up at night."

nephews' mama: "well, to be perfectly honest, nothing really does."

the nephews' mama is made of strategy.

"you have to decide, choose your days when you feel like scraping peanut butter out of the folds of somebody's ear."

my blog report on "There is a Cheerio in my fan..." by sarah.

my blog report on "There is a Cheerio in my fan..."
by sarah.

[note: this will remind the attentive reader very much of my blog report on "So This is Motherhood..." because it's pretty much the same thing. what can i say? she's still whip-smart, damn near unflappable, and a great cook. also, she gives good advice. the nephews' mama is great!]

"There is a Cheerio in my fan..." is written by the nephews' mama, who is whip-smart, damn near unflappable, a great cook, and who has one of the healthiest senses of humor i've ever seen on anyone. this is particularly amazing when one considers the fact that her constant (and i mean constant!) companions are the nephews, who are twenty months and thirty-four months old, respectively. the nephews are hilarious and clever and adorable. and, like all kids, they occasionally try a person's patience. the nephews' mama takes it all in stride, and somehow finds time to write about it too.

she also quilts and tears out blackberry vines. not joking. in addition to wonderful stories about the nephews (who are, in my unbiased opinion, THE BEST DUDES EVER!!!), you can enjoy her observations about life in a small town (think somewhere between mark twain and de toqueville...you won't be disappointed.)

in conclusion, "There is a Cheerio in my fan..." is excellent and you should go read it.

(read more blog reports)

my blog report on "So This is Motherhood..." by sarah.

so i've decided to add the fancy new blog list that lets a person know when a blog was last updated. technology! amazing!

and i thought i should take the opportunity to tell you a little bit about the blogs to which i link. and it kind of reminded me of second grade book reports. so.

my blog report on "So This is Motherhood..."
by sarah.

"So This is Motherhood..." (which, at the time of this blog report, is tragically out of commission) is written by the nephews' mama, who is whip-smart, damn near unflappable, a great cook, and who has one of the healthiest senses of humor i've ever seen on anyone. this is particularly amazing when one considers the fact that her constant (and i mean constant!) companions are the nephews, who are twenty months and thirty-four months old, respectively. the nephews are hilarious and clever and adorable. and, like all kids, they occasionally try a person's patience. the nephews' mama takes it all in stride, and in the past (and in the future) somehow finds time to write about it too.

in conclusion, "So This is Motherhood..." is excellent and you should go read it, then join me in anticipating the golden day when the nephews' mama comes out of retirement and returns to writing.

update: dang! "So This is Motherhood..." has retired like greta garbo. so you'll just have to think back on your memories of its awesomeness, or wish you had read it when you had the chance. the nephews' mama keeps telling me that new blog is on the way, though...i can hardly wait!

update update: the ever-excellent nephews' mama has started a new blog for reals! check it out: There is a Cheerio in my fan...

happy mothers' day!

to the mothers on the birth certificates (hi, mamacita and the nephews' mama!)
and the mothers who step in when somebody else's kid needs some mothering
and to all the folks, of any gender, at any time who love and nurture and cherish and challenge and encourage and appreciate and feed and hold and cuddle and play with and sing to and tuck in anyone's kids, anywhere:

thank you.

i hope you get a chance to say thank you to someone who has been like this for you today.

and also that you remember that science promises that one caring adult can make all the difference to a kid who's got all kinds of other tough stuff going on. you can be that person.

can we all just agree that two year olds can be hilarious?

today i was talking to the nephews' mama on the telephone, and nephew #1 was hanging out being awesome. she was telling me about an abandoned dog, and all of the sudden, nephew #1 starts singing (to the tune of "the farmer in the dell," in that funny, super-high voice that the tiny ones have) "ABANDONING THE DOG! ABANDONING THE DOG! HI-HO-THE-MERRY-O, ABANDONING THE DOG!"

the nephews' mama was pretty surprised. but nephew #1 wasn't done. once silly mommy and silly auntie sarah had stopped laughing about the first song, he switched to "THE FARMER IN THE TEA! THE FARMER IN THE TEA! HI-HO-THE-MERRY-O, THE FARMER IN THE TEA!"

and then he started making himself laugh (almost hysterically) with his own funniness. man, i wish i didn't live so far away from those folks.

can we all just agree that baby bobcats are incredibly cute?

the nephews' mama and the nephews and i were driving in the middle of the forest the other day when we saw a little critter in the road. at first it looked like a large housecat, but as we got a little closer we saw that it was actually a baby bobcat. baby bobcats are ridiculously cute. photographic evidence:

note the lumpy giant paws, the puffiness in the facial region, and the general adorable, "hurnh?" expression. adorable.

the nephews' mama is nothing if not reasonable.

nephew #1 has spilled some water on the floor (which is what happens sometimes when a person is using a big boy cup.) nephews' mama is getting him a towel so that he can clean it up, when she says,

"what are you doing, [nephew #1]? we're not going to add to the water on the floor by peeing."

i love those folks.

i understand.

[nephew #1 is having a tough time waking up from his nap and it's making him super whiny and tearful.]

nephews' mama: "i know you're tired."
nephew #1: [whimpering, starting to cry]
nephews' mama: "why don't you get elmo chair?"
nephew #1: [getting louder]
nephews' mama: "do you need some cheese?"
nephew #1: [stops crying] "yes."

can we all just agree that public transportation should be cheaper and easier?

tomorrow the nephews' mama is coming to visit (HOORAY!) and so i have to decide: do i drive to pick her up from the airport (19 minutes; 12.7 miles) or do i take public transportation to the airport to meet her (53 minutes; $5.10 per person per way)?

i'm leaning toward driving, because i'm tired and i want to sleep in, but i hate the fact that i am.

i'm sorry, nephews' mama, but sometimes your problems make me laugh.

n.m.: "i'm sorry, but i have to go now. my two year old has reached monsterous levels of trollishness."

me: "ooh, sorry."

n.m.: "well, he just dumped his entire dinner on the dog."

the nephews' mama's awesomeness. let me show you it.

"you can look forward to grad school, i can look forward to preschool, that way we both have something to look forward to."

-superstar nephews' mama

can we all just agree that this is pretty much one of the best days ever in the blog-o-sphere?

because:

blogger has finally made it so that i can be signed in to my c.w.a.j.a.?. account and posting in one tab, and using my other gmail addresses in another! hooray! hooray hooray!

and, more importantly, the nephews' mom has started her very own blog, So This is Motherhood...! now you can go read about the exciting exploits of the dudes from someone who has the opportunity to witness them firsthand! all the time! and you can leave her nice comments to welcome her to the interweb. (and to give her another valuable opportunity to interact with people who are potty trained.) ps it is very funny. you won't regret it.

can we all just agree that working from home is excellent?

and not just because it allows you to respond promptly to voicemail messages like this:

nephews' mama: "i'm not going to try to tell the whole story on your voicemail, because it will cut me off like it always does, but i will just say that you need to call me back as soon as possible, and make sure that i don't forget to tell you about the babypowder incident. you're also going to be really sad that our camera is in the car that's in [name of city that is very far from where they live] in the shop. call me back!"

can we all just agree that two year olds are rad?

i was taking pictures of nephew #1 while he was eating a muffin. he said something i couldn't understand, and held the muffin right up to his forehead, then smiled for the picture. his mom, who is more or less fluent in his very own variety of weird alien little kidspeak, cracked up, and when she was finally able to translate for me, i learned that he was saying, "smile, muffin!"

oh dude, and the picture came out super cute too.

can we all just agree that the nephews' mama gives good advice?

"you know, sarah, there are times when you reach not a fork but an octopus in the road."

can we all just agree that the nephews' mama is amazing?

today, while we were talking on the telephone, she said, "[nephew #1], can you go take the letter H out of brother's mouth?"

it's no wonder her kids are totally brilliant.

can we all just agree that there's really nothing quite like hearing your almost-23-month-old nephew saying your name over the telephone to melt your

little heart?

here is what happened:

nephews' mama: "[nephew #1], i'm talking to auntie sarah."
nephew #1: "sarah!?"

good heavens he's adorable and i can't wait to see him again soon soon soon.